Blessings from Berlin

It's been almost one week since I returned from Berlin. Our team left on October 17 and headed to Germany to serve and care for refugees.

Our team was made up of two ladies, Marsha and Nikki, from a church in Dallas. (Small world: Nikki is from Little Rock and we knew each other in high school. We only reconnected after she signed up for the trip!). Two young ladies from Alabama, Caitlin and Ashley. They have gone on multiple e3 trips and are seasoned travelers. My co-worker Mary and her dad John. It was really fun to watch John experience Mary in her element. And lastly, two gents, Ron and Curt, from California. Ron and Curt are members of one of the Miller's supporting churches. (The Millers are one of our missionary partners in Berlin.) A lot of places were represented, but we messed together quickly and had a lot of fun.

We explored the city, trained with the missionaries, prayed, and served all week long; but, a few stories and a few faces stick out in my mind.

One afternoon, early in the week, Ashley and Caitlin, Mary and John, were en route to meet with Rob, one of our missionary partners, and a few young believers for Bible study. Caitlin was thirsty and stopped for a bottle of water. As she walked into the store a man approached the door, smiled and held the door for Caitlin. Once they were inside the man sparked a conversation with Caitlin. He spoke little German and even less English, but Caitlin was able to communicate through Google translate. Technology is amazing.

This man, we will call him Michael, immigrated from Syria and suffered a lot during the war. He is in a lot of physical pain, because of shrapnel still in his back. Caitlin invited Michael to meet the rest of her friends and they started talking about Jesus.

The next day, Caitlin, Ashley and Nikki went with Rob to meet Michael to talk more about Jesus and the Bible. Michael was excited to meet with them, so excited that he brought a friend with him. His friend's name is Matt (name changed). They both had a lot of good questions about the Bible and what it says about Jesus. We invited both of them to dinner to meet other believers from the Middle East. Michael declined to join us, because he was in a lot of pain due to his existing injury, but Matt came along!

Matt is extremely interested in Jesus Christ. Rob is going to start meeting with him to talk more and answer questions. We are hopeful that Michael will join as well, but there is a fire inside of Matt to know about Jesus and we hope to call him a brother soon!

A view from a train stop near our hotel. Berlin is so beautiful, but also so spiritually in need.

One evening, we had dinner with multiple young men from Afghanistan, Iran, and Syria, who have all come to know Jesus OR are very close to knowing Jesus as their Savior. One of the young men, Ralph, was extremely quiet. He sat and watched as we chatted through broken English and/or over Google translate. As the evening wore on he came out of his shell little by little. John and Ralph really connected and by the end of the evening they were giving each other bear hugs, exclaiming, "We are family! My brother. You're my brother."

These young men have literally lost everything. Some of them due to war and others to circumstances; many because of their decision to follow Jesus. When they meet other men and women who share their passion for Jesus, they are literally accepted and loved like their family.

Our brother Ralph has several tattoos and at dinner we asked him what they meant. He lifted up his sleeve and showed us one on his arm of the Cross! I exclaimed, "Wow you have a tattoo about Jesus." He told us that he got the tattoo eight years ago in Iran. He did not know what it meant, but he got it because thought it looked cool. He told us, "NOW (7-years later) I know what this means and I love it even more. I love Jesus!" How cool!? Praise God for this young man and for the unknown tattoo that now holds so much meaning for our brother Ralph.

Our team at the Brandenburg Gate during the Light's Festival

There was another young man we met during our time in Berlin named Arnold. He was also very timid at first. He spoke a little English so he was able to communicate with our team just a bit more than some of the other guys.

Nikki and I were chatting with him and asked if he had any family. He hung his head and said no. He did not have any family left. He lost his family in the war in Afghanistan. We continued to ask questions about his life and interests and we asked if he knew about Jesus. His eyes filled with emotion and he told us, "Yes I have heard about him, but I have so many questions." We acknowledge that it's great to have questions and we can help answer some if he'd like.

He smiled and we told him that, "Jesus loves him and we love him too." His eyes filled with tears and he nodded his head. We met with Arnold a couple more times throughout the week and were excited to hear that he is now officially a brother in Christ!

Great shot of the TV tower, St. Mary's Church, and statue of Martin Luther.

When you hear so many stories they can start to mix together and lose meaning. There is so much pain in our world -- so many people in need and so many people hurting. But, what I was reminded of in Berlin is we each have a story. Every individual has a story and while it would be impossible for any one human to help or know all of the suffering -- God knows all of it. He knows every single story and every single hurt. He promises to heal our hearts and one day dry all of our tears.

We hope for this day, but as we hope I pray we tell as many people as we can about Jesus and the eternal, life giving, life changing, LIVING hope He brings to us NOW and for eternity.

Please pray for Berlin. Pray for our missionary partners who are there full time on the front lines. Pray for new refugee families who come to start a new life. Pray for Berliners who don't know Christ. Germany has a great place in church history, but it is a dark and dry place. Less than 1% of Berliners know about Jesus. It's a city of almost 3.5 million people!!!

Pray for these people. Pray for our new brothers and friends - Michel, Matt, Ralph and Arnold.

Thank you for your love and care while I was in Berlin. Thank you for your prayer support and financial support. I would not be able to go and serve without you.

all of my love and for His Glory, Caroline

We got to go to Wittenberg (an hour train from Berlin) and saw the church door where Martin Luther nailed the 95-thesis. It is the 500th anniversary THIS MONTH! So cool to be in the town where the Reformation started. 

This is a shelter for the homeless and disabled in the middle of Berlin. They have religious ties, but also receive government sanctions. I was encouraged and humbled by the verse. It's Jeremiah 29:7 and reads, "Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper." 

A beautiful windy day in Berlin at the Berliner Dom. I have been to Berlin multiple times and each time I am shocked by it's size, diversity, and darkness.  God is at work in Berlin, but this is a city that is desperate for hope. We have the everlasting and living hope of Christ. Pray for revival in this city and the workers who live in and love this city. 

Lunga-Lunga, Kenya

Hey team:

It's been a whirlwind over here. Joel and I got married April 15 and then honeymooned for a week in Jamaica; and two weeks later I left with a medical team for Kenya. After two weeks of recovering from travel and sickness I'm back in business.

And my first order of business is to tell you about our trip to Kenya!

Our team was made up of nursing students from the University of Alabama, four high energy and high spirited New Yorkers, and a few others from Texas, Arkansas, North Carolina and Kentucky. We were a motley crew.

Our team outside the hotel

There are dozens of stories I could tell about our time in Kenya, but a three stick out in my mind:

1. The National Partners 

Catherine is second from the right.

As a part of e3 Partner's strategy in Lunga-Lunga, we partner with local pastors and missionaries. The team of nationals working in Lunga-Lunga and the surrounding areas is amazing. These men and women have dedicated their lives to share the Gospel with the lost in Kenya.

Me and Anne with Alfa our Kenyan strategy leader.

Catherine, Body and Simon are currently in missionary training school in Kenya. Catherine is from northern Kenya, but has a passion to share the Gospel with Muslims; and Body and Simon are from the Congo! Both of them felt called to be missionaries in Kenya and moved to come to the training school.

Catherine and I went to the village together one the first day and it was surreal to talk with her about church planting and missions strategies. I know that's strange, but it gets me excited to hear that Catherine is learning the exact same strategies I've been learning in the States. We are both learning how to share the Gospel with Muslims and how to reach the unreached of the world with the Gospel!

As we talked, I was reminded how self possessed I can be...let me explain. I assume all of these cool mission strategies and tools come out of America, because I'm from here...doesn't everything good and cool come from MY country? BIG FAT NO. I KNOW this in my head, but so often my heart forgets.

When I learned Catherine is learning the same things as I am in another country across the world, well that humbled AND excited me. God is doing an amazing work in this area. He is sending workers to come and claim His people for His glory and His honor.

Daniel, Simon, Body, D, Hassan and Skyler - men of God!

2. The Rain

We came to Lunga-Lunga in the rainy season and we were ready for it!

We spent almost every evening packing medicines and vitamins for patients. And because of the rain, evenings were also spent shouting over the downpour that pounded on the tin roof of our hotel. There is nothing like a good power outage and minor flooding to bond a team together. 

Playing at the school next to our purple bus!

It actually rained so much that we were unable to get to Lunga-Lunga on our second day of clinic. My co-leader Alfa, called a local pastor and asked if he would be open to host our medical team at their Christian school...he said come on! We drove through unpaved, flooded, dirt roads to get to the Christian school and church to set up clinic. 

The surrounding villages had no idea we were coming, BUT we spread the word and within a few hours over 400 people were at the clinic doors. The rain might have kept us from Lunga-Lunga, but God had other plans for the day. 

Every child in every classroom at the school heard the Gospel from our team that day. The head master of the school reported to us that 90% of the students are from Muslim families. Seeds were planted and lives were changed.

3. The Bridge and the Purple Bus

The rain stopped half way through the week, which meant we were able to get back across the flooded bridge into Lunga-Lunga.

We had an amazing day of clinic and played with tons of children. A small team went into the village again to share the Gospel and invite people to the clinic. 

The 'waiting' room tent for the clinic.

At the end of a long day, we loaded up our huge purple bus with almost 40 people plus equipment and set off towards our hotel. 

About half way to the bridge crossing, we get a call -- the bridge had collapsed as a result of the rains earlier in the week. My co-leader and I looked at each other and said, "The bridge we drove over this morning? That one? That bridge collapsed?" Okay. Well, praise God no one was hurt and praise God we were not on the bridge when it collapsed. 

As a result, we would have to take the long way around to get back to our hotel. 

The actual time it would take to get back was unknown, because our driver only knew part of the route. We picked up someone in one of the villages who was kind enough to ride along and show us the way through the hilly and pot holed filled dirt roads. 

About two hours in to the trek a few of us in the front of the bus noticed the gas light had come on.

Now, you might know, but just incase you don't -- there are NOT a lot of gas stations in the middle of the African bush. There are a few in town, but no so much outside of town.

We just started to pray. 

And the gas light stayed on for 15-minutes. 

And 15-minutes, became 30-minutes, and that became 45-minutes.

And it started getting dark and people started getting hungry. 

Even after a 'bathroom' stop the bus just kept going. 

And we kept praying. 

After almost three total hours on the backroads we made it to the main road! The gas light had been on for 45-minutes. 

We were still rolling. 

We made it to a gas station at about the one-hour mark. 

Now I can for sure push filling up my car at home, but there is no way I could go for an hour. 

God did a miracle. A literal loaves and fishes miracle. 

After we got gas, we just looked at each other and laughed, because what in the world! God knew we'd have that detour and he provided a miraculous way for us to get home. 

So needless to say God was present and did some remarkable things in Lunga-Lunga. One of which was multiplying our gas to get us through the bush in the middle of the night!

The line for suckers was long!

It was an honor to serve in Lunga-Lunga and I will not forget the faces of the people there nor will I forget all God did among the Digo people. 

Please pray for all of the national workers who are giving their lives to these people in Kenya. Remember the Digo people and ask that many would come to know Christ as their Lord and Savior. 

all my love. until next time. 

caroline

Germany and beyond...

Our team of 22-people arrived in Germany on October 2 and we adjusted to urban life quickly. We walked an average of 6 miles a day and used public transportation frequently. I loved being in the city and enjoyed helping lead the team through the concrete German jungle. 

Our assignment for the week was to reach out to refugees living in the area in an effort to hear their stories and share Christ's story. 

The long term missionary families we worked with are rock stars. Their team is comprised of three families and all have hearts to share the hope of Jesus with refugees AND Germans. It was an honor to work with them. 

While we were in the city, our days were made up of training in the mornings and in the afternoons, we would break into smaller teams and spread out around the city. Some of our sub teams went to refugees camps and helped by serving tea, folding laundry or helping with childcare. Other teams went directly to the homes or apartments of refugees to share a meal or have tea. 

My sub team concentrated on visiting refugee camps in the middle of the city. We went and played soccer with families and ping pong with young men. 

In the evenings, we would all come together for fellowship dinners. As we met people throughout the day, we invited them to dinner. Our goal was to create a safe place for refugees to come and enjoy a meal. 

On the first night we had 5 people come to dinner. On the second night we had 20 people come to dinner and on the last night we had over 50 people come to dinner!

The numbers kept growing night after night as people heard about the American, German, Iranian, Iraqi and Afghani believers eating and welcoming people in love and friendship. 

Sitting in the coffee shop/church in the middle of the city watching men and women from all over the world talk and fellowship was a holy moment. It felt like a little taste of heaven when all of the nations will come and worship the one true King.

It was an honor to meet men and women from Iran who came to German not just because of war, but because they wanted to be free to worship "the Jesus" as they would say. I got to pray and talk with sisters from Iran who are now free to worship the God they love. 

On the first night, I was honored to meet a young man named B. B lost his entire family because of the war. We talked through Google Translate (technology is amazing) for an hour about sports, family, and God. I asked him if he knew God. His response was, "Of course!" He laughed when I asked him, because who doesn't know about God right?

And then I asked him if he knew Jesus. His response was more subdued and he nodded, but then changed the subject quickly. Come to find out, B has heard about Jesus a lot. His new friend from his refugee camp has been telling him about Jesus. 

B is so fully of hope and joy. For someone who's suffered so much, I was in awe of his tenacity for life; and now he has an eternal hope, because of Christ. At the fellowship dinner, he accepted Christ as the Lord of his life. 

I was not at the dinner when this happened. I took a group back to the hotel early. But, when the second half of the team arrived at the hotel and told me my new friend was now my new brother I was overcome with excitement and joy. 

This is just one story of hundreds and I suspect thousands. God is moving among refugees and among Muslims like we have never seen before. 

He is close to the broken hearted and He is near to those who suffer. I saw this first hand in Germany. I am humbled and honored to have been a very small part of the movement that is happening in Germany and Europe. 

God is on the move and I am excited to see what happens in the next few years. This window of opportunity will not stay open forever. Would you pray for more workers to go into the harvest? Would you pray for people to be open to the Gospel of hope? Would you be open to go with me? 

We are all called to participate in the spreading of God's word and I hope you find joy in praying, going or giving to missions both locally and globally! 

To God Be the Glory! 

Caroline 

Understanding Grace

Grace is difficult for me to grasp. 

I understand ‘grace’ in the Biblical sense—we have been given favor and forgiveness from our sins, because of God’s sacrifice and his mercy towards us. 

However, when ‘real’ life comes in to play, it is difficult for me to grasp the concept of grace. Specifically, it’s difficult for me to show myself grace.

I like rules. Let me candid—I love rules. Rules bring balance and structure to my life. I was typically a teacher’s pet, because I enjoyed school. I did my homework and classwork, because I liked to learn. It just so happened I also liked praise from adults. Is it my fault these activities went hand in hand? I still enjoy ticking things off of my to-do list and I enjoy praise from others when I finish a project at work. 

What I didn’t realize until I was an adult was somewhere along the line I became my own worst critic. I would internally criticize myself if I didn’t complete a personal or work goal. If I only completed three things off of my long personal to-do list, I would chastise myself, “Come on Caroline. You’re better than this. Why didn’t you do the whole list?” 

When I slept in after a long week instead of getting up and going to the gym, I would beat myself up. “You’re so lazy. You worked all week and you can’t even get up on a Saturday morning?” 

I thought setting high standards for myself was necessary. In reality, the standards or rules, I set up to bring balance to my life actually weighed me down. The personal goals and check lists I thought helped me be a better person, helped motivate me to exercise more, do more, be better actually crushed my spirit. The rules I set up to bring me freedom brought destruction. 

Living a life of grace is hard. It’s hard, because it causes you to get rid of your own rules that make you feel safe. Rules or standards that make you feel like you’ve accomplished something or that you are worth something. 

Setting goals and having rules are not wrong; however, when you start to find your identity in your rules that’s when you need a heart check. When your rules become idols is when you need to step back and ask Jesus to give you a clear and intense dose of the Gospel. 

The Gospel is the truth that seeps deep in to your heart and redefines everything about you. 

When you are faced with the truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, you are challenged to let go of your own rules that make you feel safe and embrace a Savior who literally saves you from yourself. 

The thing about letting go of rules and accepting grace is it’s scary. For me rules are comfortable. If I give control over to God I’m scared I will somehow loose myself. What if I give him too much or not enough? 

When God is in control and when we rest in His grace we are safe. When God holds our hearts we cannot be destroyed. We may bend or even crack, but we are eternally safe in Jesus Christ, because we have an eternal hope in him. 

When you start to hand over the rules of your life to Jesus something begins to grow inside your spirit. When you begin to believe you are enough, because of what Jesus did for you and not because of your own efforts, hope is planted in your soul. 

The thing about hope is it’s like a seed that grips your heart and once it’s planted it grows…it spreads and it blocks all other weeds. It ruins you. It infects you. It spreads and leaves you breathless. 

Copyright © 2016 Caroline Damron. All rights reserved.

Gumuze City, Ethiopia

We worked in Gumuze City, Ethiopia and the surrounding villages. The trek to the Gumuze was a long one: 5-hours on a bus through lush and bumpy territory. I managed to take a whole bottle of dramamine by myself throughout the week. 

The plan for the first day was to set up the medical clinic in a government run compound. The majority of the team would run the clinic and four members of the team would go in to the villages. I was a part of the village team. Our goal was to visit eight families and bring them love gifts of clothing, salt and soap.

Our first morning we loaded up the bus with our team of 26 Americans and 15 Ethiopians. Half way through our 3-hour drive to the government clinic, we realized we'd forgotten the gifts for the village families. The eight bags were back at our hotel...

Rule number one of the mission field is to be flexible. We stopped the bus. One of our hard working Ethiopian church planters, T, jumped off of the bus, caught a small taxi and headed back to the hotel to get the gifts. 

We arrived at the government facility and there was already a line of patients waiting. While we waited on T to return from the hotel, the village team jumped in to help the medical team set up and facilitate. 

Several hours later, T arrived with the gifts. By this time it was too late for us to visit each of the eight families individually. We decided to walk to the first house and hope for the best. The trek was long and the sun was hot. Our translators told me and my two college students that we were 'strong women' to walk this road in the middle of the day. We smiled and laughed through the sweat. It's not fun unless you get sweaty and dusty right? 

When we arrived at the first home, we were greeted with smiling faces and generous hospitably. As we sat down to visit the first family, more and more people kept showing up. One of the translators leaned over to me and said, "We have all eight families here. Are you ready to go inside?" I was floored! We couldn't make it to all eight families so they all came to us!

We walked in and sat down on homemade chairs close to the hard dirt floor. Sixteen wide eyed adults sat in front of us. One of our goals in addition to sharing the gospel, is to educate the community on health issues. One of our students, Paula, shared with the families through a translator about malaria causes and prevention. I was able to share a piece of my testimony and Diane, our trip leader, shared the Gospel. 

As the story of the Gospel was translated, I focused on the families. One man to my right was rapt in attention. His eyes widen as Diane and the translators shared the story of Christ coming to earth and dying for our sins. 

After we shared, the translators, who are amazing and passionate church planters in the area, shared a little more. T, the man who had gone back to retrieved our gifts at the hotel, started to speak. He spoke with passion and authority as he explained the Gospel to his countrymen. I don't know what he was saying, but I know that T can preach the word! 

As T shared, more eyes lit up. Everyone in the room was interested in this man called Jesus.

We asked T what the families thought. He told us that everyone wanted to accept Christ: all eight families wanted to follow Jesus. 

My eyes filled with tears as he said the words. Praise the Lord for His plans are better than our own! 

We immediately asked the families if they would take the tools we'd used to share the gospel (small picture tracks) and share the gospel with each other! The man who's eyes lit up early in the conversation stood up. He said he would share with the group. It was an honor to see these new believers, men and women, learn to share what they just heard with others. 

So many times we make discipleship and telling others about Jesus difficult; but, in the New Testament we see over and over again, people hearing the Good News, being transformed and going out to their neighbors and friends and telling them about Jesus. Disciples making disciples making disciples. 

T and his friends will continue to meet with these families of new believers. They are committed to discipling and encouraging these families who are new in their faith. 

It was an honor to be a small part of their story. To share the Good News and the hope of Christ with brothers and sisters around the world...well there is nothing better than that. 

Life's Not Logical

I wrote this a couple months ago for our church's women's blog...I just found it again and thought I would share...God's using this reality to speak to me today and I hope He uses it to speak to you as well :) Blessings.

 So often we want life to make sense.

We want a plan and a road map lined out…because we all know that trusting God will be very doable if we have a plan. We seem to say, “God I can trust you…I will give you everything…if I know what you’re planning to take away from me and what your next move is…if I know those few details I can completely trust you.”

 It’s as if we give God our hearts, but only conditionally:

      I’ll trust you as long as I know what you’re going to take away so I’ll know not to put a lot of time or effort into that thing or person.

      I’ll trust you as long as I know what my job is going to look like so I’ll know who to be nice to at the office and what extra credentials to pursue in preparation.

      I’ll trust you as long as I know whom I’m going to marry and when I’m going to meet him so I can make sure to have a free schedule and an open life plan.

We essentially want trust to be in our control, which, if we think about, is not trust at all. That kind of trust is fear driven…it’s self-driven…it’s driven by our deep desire to control.

This control thing seems to be an ongoing issue with women around the world since the beginning of time even. Remember that one girl named Eve? God told her she could trust him for everything, but there was one detail: she did not need to eat the fruit from one tree in the garden. She trusted him when it seemed logical to her, but the moment someone (the serpent) made an alternate argument… “Oh Eve God is just trying to keep you from something…he’s just trying to keep you from being in control…you want to be in control right? Well then girlfriend, eat that fruit and seize control of your life!”

 And Eve did.

 She let the fear that God was holding out on her, the fear that God was not being good to her, that God was really hurting her…drive her to take some of the fruit and eat.

 This is not a new story to us. Number one because we’ve heard it in the church, but also because it’s the cry of our own hearts everyday.

 We want life to make sense, to be logical, but so many times it doesn’t. So instead of resting in the One who does make sense we try and manipulate or put meaning to our own lives…our own situations.

 But what God wants us to do is recognize that life does not make sense. So many times our situations or lack of movement cause us to think something is wrong…they prompt us to take control and make sense of them…because once we understand what’s going on THEN, oh THEN we can trust God!

 But we’re never called to an understanding of our world, nor our situations…we’re called to dig deeper and rest assuredly in the arms of Christ. “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding…”.

 My own understanding even at it’s best is flawed, because it is tainted with sin and with my desire to be in control…my desire to know what I’m getting myself into…

 I challenge you (and myself) to step back and acknowledge that no matter how hard we try we’re never going to have our lives figured out. We’re never going to be able to rationalize our next best move nor the next best step… But what we can do is believe that God is in control…and that He loves us and in time He will show us the best next step.

 We don’t have to know what’s around the bend…especially because we’re not driving the car of our lives…God is… Life won’t always make sense…and that’s really hard to accept sometimes, because in accepting that we acknowledge we have no control (dang it, we have no control!).

When we acknowledge our lack of control the next best step is to give the authority, the honor and the driver’s seat over to the One who does. So let’s continually (continually…every day, every minute, every second) trust and hand over the wheel to the One who planned this whole road trip anyways…God the Father, who loves us, who sent His son Jesus to die for our sins, and His Holy Spirit to be our constant comfort.

 So here’s to no plan or rather letting go of our understanding of “the plan,” our life…and here’s to embracing the One who it’s all about anyways…Jesus Christ.

 Cheers, Caroline

blast from da past...again

another loverly post from my time in France...I know I'm a bit obsessed but come on it's France for pete's sake ;)

Enjoy. Cheers.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

I was extremely excited about visiting the Loire Valley—who doesn’t like castles. My excitement was increased when our tour guide turned out to be the most wonderfully entertaining and one of the most knowledgeable women in the Loire Valley. She was just perfect for our group.

I loved that she told us about the people of the castles and châteaux, because when you simply hear about the buildings or the furniture or the artwork your mind begins to run together but when you hear about the people that is when the stories come alive.

Me and Chambord castle.

The people and the history of Europe have always fascinated me. I particularly love imagining life as it would have been for the people of the middle Ages, and it was awesome to hear about some of the very people that have always interested me—Henry II and Eleanor of Aquitaine. With this background of people and history I was able to really appreciate the castles more. I was able to imagine all of the work and the life that was conducted in these huge homes.

My favorite castle was probably Chambord—Francois I huge hunting lodge. I loved it because of its grandeur and the intricate design that you could look at forever but held a certain harmony that pleased your eye at the same time. The winding stairs were particularly wonderful (however I do not see how plays were held on them).

Chambord castle

The entire Loire Valley holds a sort of mystery and amazing since of the past it just makes your heart come alive with imagination and the beauty pleases your senses and leaves you breath taken.

I <3 the Loire Valley.

Chateau de Chaumont

From the Past...

I've technically been blogging since the spring of 2008. That's a little over three years, which is strange to think.

Anyways.

My original blog was meant primarily for my friends and family to read while I was studying abroad in France during my sophomore year in college. It's fun for me to go back from time to time and read some entries from my travels...one stuck out to me recently so I thought I would share. {also this is my attempt to make more blog posts on this blog...even if it is a recycled post...shhhh}

Sunday, May 11, 2008

When I read on our calendar that we were going to Giverny I had no initial excitement or extreme interest, because I had no idea what or even where Giverny was. When I found out that it would the place of Monet’s gardens I was very pleased: I like Monet it would be nice to see the garden’s that he painted so often.

If I had only known in that moment—when we walked up to Monet’s house you could not help but fall in love with everything around you.



The colors of the flowers were magnificent, and as our tour guide told us, were very particularly planted by Monet. He mixed certain warm and cool colors together to create a feeling or to draw your eyes in a certain way. Monet would love to see how the light played off of the different mixtures of color—it was just amazing to hear all of the specific detail he placed in his garden.
When we crossed the road toward the Japanese water garden my mind was still on the rows and rows of flowers back at the house, but when we came upon the water and the weeping willows my heart was stolen again.

Monet really knew how to capture the imagination through natural beauty. He saw how humanity grows and can really live through nature. He was a little eccentric (a little more than most) but his genius has left the world with beautiful works of art and with a garden restored to its original beauty to again tempt the public as it had tempted him.


My best friend/roommate Anna and me in Monet's garden...obviously having too much fun.

'I'm here to take photos...'

Event photographs or party pictures make up a lot of the content in the magazine I work for...we're essentially a socialite, city magazine, etc. And a part of my job is going to said events and snapping those coveted "party pics" of the attendees.

Sometimes people runaway from me...no joke. I guess they don't want their photo in one of the city's most read magazines but whatever. Other people squeal when I tell them I'm from Soiree magazine. If I had to choose I prefer the squealers to the runners...at least they will talk to me.

But the weird thing I have found about being an event photographer (or event photog as they say in the biz) is that you're essentially a stalker.

I am paid to stalk people.

I wait on the edge of the event ready to pounce on the next honoree or "in-the-know" person who walks by...I know who's who and I wait for my photo subjects to appear just like a lion waits for it's prey! It's not really that dramatic, but pretending it is makes going to tons of events more interesting from my perspective at least...

So as a photo stalker does that mean am I the equivalent of a paid assassin in the social world? Perhaps, because, seemingly, your social status could very well depend on whether or not you were seen at a certain event...and who has the power to permanently ("permanently") capture your presence? We'll that would be me.

Nice to meet you. Please don't run away from me.

Until the next party...look for me...I'll be lurking in the shadows or out in the open scrambling to get 30 photos so I can leave and go home ;)

the Buried Life

i am a poetry fan. i would not say i am obsessed or that i am an expert in the poetry genre BUT i do enjoy reading and writing poetry.

one of my favorite poems, which i discovered in college, is by English poet Matthew Arnold. I love this poem because it suggests that as humans we have a depth of emotion and thought that sometimes we do not even know exists. He talks about how in the most unassuming moments, in the times where we are most surrounded, distracted that we soon discover an inexplicable well of emotion, knowledge, whatever in ourselves. We suddenly identify with others or received a clarity about life we had not experienced before.

that at least is what i get out of the poem. But see that's what i love about poetry in the first place--you may read this. love it. but get a completely different message from it. {kind of like scripture...but that's another post}

here is an excerpt from "The Buried Life." If you have time you should read the whole thing BUT for now enjoy this snippet.


The Buried Life
By: Matthew Arnold


But often, in the world's most crowded streets,
But often, in the din of strife,
There rises an unspeakable desire
After the knowledge of our buried life;
A thirst to spend our fire and restless force
In tracking out our true, original course;
A longing to inquire
Into the mystery of this heart which beats
So wild, so deep in us--to know
Whence our lives come and where they go.

And many a man in his own breast then delves,
But deep enough, alas! none ever mines.
And we have been on many thousand lines,
And we have shown, on each, spirit and power;
But hardly have we, for one little hour,
Been on our own line, have we been ourselves--
Hardly had skill to utter one of all
The nameless feelings that course through our breast,
But they course on for ever unexpress'd.

And long we try in vain to speak and act
Our hidden self, and what we say and do
Is eloquent, is well--but 'tis not true!
And then we will no more be rack'd
With inward striving, and demand
Of all the thousand nothings of the hour

Their stupefying power;
Ah yes, and they benumb us at our call!
Yet still, from time to time, vague and forlorn,
From the soul's subterranean depth upborne
As from an infinitely distant land,
Come airs, and floating echoes, and convey
A melancholy into all our day.
Only--but this is rare--
When a belov'ed hand is laid in ours,
When, jaded with the rush and glare
Of the interminable hours,
Our eyes can in another's eyes read clear,
When our world-deafen'd ear
Is by the tones of a loved voice caress'd--
A bolt is shot back somewhere in our breast,
And a lost pulse of feeling stirs again.

The eye sinks inward, and the heart lies plain,
And what we mean, we say, and what we would, we know.
A man becomes aware of his life's flow,
And hears its winding murmur; and he sees
The meadows where it glides, the sun, the breeze.

the Golden Globes

my dear friend noel author of the absolutely hilarious blog passion tea lemonade, has inspired me to comment on the recent 'Golden Globe' awards.

hosting the show was the genius creator of 'the office', Ricky Gervais. it was his second year to host the globes and he did a great job...although the dozens of people he openly criticized and made fun of probably do not agree with me...i, however, enjoyed his gut wrenching, jaw dropping honesty...while it crossed the line, actually it jumped about 10 feet passed the line, it was a refreshing commentary on the stars of Hollywood and how many of them live their lives...

{Via}

and while the shocked looks on the faces of the audience made me a little apprehensive in my outward joy of Ricky's job as host, his comment, 'oh come on you knew what you were getting yourself into (loosely quoted)'i heartily agreed and felt comfortable to express my joy at his joking. the globes higher ups knew what Ricky was capable of and they endorsed his hosting abilities so i will endorse them as well!

well enough about Ricky. he was really only on air for a total of 7 minutes the entire show...

{Via}

Natalie Portman got some flack for her 'nasty' acceptance speech...while it was a bit weird that she thanked her fiance for impregnating her so she could continue the life line of her family, she did not confess that she had magical sexual powers that when used would ensure the success of an actress' career...*cough* Robert Downey Jr....

{Via}

there were several shots of Brad and Angie throughout the night. awwww. don't care.

{Via}

I'm over Brad and Angelina. they're in love. they have a dozen kids. they travel the world. good for them. i don't want to see them every other shot: Angie putting on lip gloss. Angie adjusting brad's tie. Brad and Angie cuddling. i want to watch the golden globes not the Bradgelina Entertainment Hour.

Steve Carrell is the bomb. {how will 'the office' go on!?} and Tina fey is my idol. enough said.

{Via : this is not from this year globes...but look how cute they are :) }

just a few more thoughts and I'm done with my rant and rave...

why in the heck was the 'star' of 'easy A' nominated for a golden golbe for acting...i do not understand. now i have not seen the movie, however i think it is safe to say that 'easy A' will not go down in history as a great commentary on our society or will it be said that it was a wonderful contribution to the world of film.

{Via}

i know that 'the social network' was the major 'winner' of the night: it received the GG for the director, original score, and best picture...i haven't see it...but i have seen 'Inception' and i feel like 'Inception' GOT THE SHAFT!


{Via}

did the the Hollywood Foreign Film Association even see 'Inception?' i don't think they did...

If you agree, disagree, or would simply like to add your own comments about the Golden Globes PLEASE don't hesitate to continue this lovely 'speech' my friend noel started.

*cue music*

scribbler

Jo March=Louisa May Alcott

we all have our favorite authors {well if you're an avid reader you do} and often our favorite authors in adulthood are the same we idolized as children.

even though my literary tastes have significantly widen since i was a kid, i still have a special place in my heart for the authors that first mesmerized my literary imagination when i was young.

{via}

Louisa May Alcott, best known for her novel, "Little Women," has held a special place in my heart ever since i read her beloved book.

i saw myself in Jo, i sympathized with Beth, i envied Meg, and i wanted to smack Amy...until she married Laurie THEN i envied her ;)

{via}

While my initial love for Louisa stemmed from the characters it grew into an appreciation and a recognition of her creation especially when i found out that the novel was loosely based upon Louisa's own childhood, and that the character Jo was basically Louisa's alternate ego.

i unknowingly made the conclusion that if Louisa 'was' Jo and i 'knew' Jo than in essence i 'knew' Louisa {and to take it a step further} if i wanted to be like Jo then i wanted to be like Louisa.

{via from the 1994 film 'Little Women' staring Winona Ryder}

my mom calls me 'her Jo.'--i'm wild, stubborn, i love to read and write, but in the end it's all about my family and friends...like myself, Jo {Louisa} had a passion for life and everyone who knew her could see it.

maybe that's why Alcott is one of my favorite authors not just because of what she wrote, but because i can see myself in her.

i think that's one of the reasons we read in the first place...one of the reasons we have favorite authors and favorite characters--it's because we see a piece of who we are or who we want to be and by reading we feel we can grasp something deeper about ourselves and grow into something more of who we're supposed to be.

so i challenge you to never stop discovering through the written word, go ahead read a favorite book from when you were young, AND never let your imagination fade away--let it grow and let it grow you into a better you :)

{if you would like to know more about Louisa this is an excellent biography--wonderfully written, easy to read, and extremely insightful especially for Alcott fans}

with love,

scribbler

"Language is the armory of the human mind..." --Coleridge

Language.

{via: an acomplished lady always knows how to express herself through writing. and yet another way to communicate through language}

I think that the structure and subtleties of language, any language, is fascinating. {obviously i'm wired to favor English since it is "mine"}

It is so strange, when you sit back and think:

-who decided the Spanish should roll the 'R' sound while the French hawk it?
-what is the deal with the English spelling of words {they're, their, there}?
-when did certain accents or phrases come into existence?
-where did the idea that people with a British-English accents are automatically smarter than the rest of the world come from?
-why are there literally dozens of languages in a single isolated area on the continent of Africa? and
-HOW in the world did we end up with all of these different languages anyways?---

i must confess my love of the English accent is what prompted this post {not as intellectually motivated as you might have supposed}:

“Hallo, Hallo? Oh yeah I can hear you now.”

-—now imagine a tall English guy saying this as he walks through the grocery store on his phone...this is my life. this is the reason i've been spurred to talk about my love of languages.


{via: college chaps discussing intellectual literary things i'm sure}

I have a degree in English Language and Literature--now before you start 'oohing' and 'awing' ;) let me confess that while i'm extremely proud of my degree it is focused on literature more than language--so while i love to talk about language my depth of knowledge only goes so far...

However my passion for language goes very deep--i tend to be one who is obsessed with words and how they can truly change the world--how the right amount of dedication, talent and wisdom can be filtered through a love of writing to produce something not only beautiful but also influential.

aside from the written word i also have a fondness for accents in general---i can do a pretty good French, British (Londoner), Spanish (Barcelona), Southern Belle, Southern Hick, and New Jersey accent--they've for sure been years in the making ;)

I love the life and the vivacity that words have when they pop out of a person's mouth in a different accent than what i'm used to...in general different accents or languages have this affect on me aesthetically, not only because of the sounds but because a language is a door into a person's culture, a window into the dealings and perspectives of the world this person's culture holds.

never thought of it that way huh? ;)


{via: British politicians discussing well politics...one of the ways language is used to influence and sometimes manipulate...}

so the next time you run into somebody with a different accent or someone who speaks a different language--let your mind wander to all of the history, power, beauty, and possibilities that lie behind the words they are speaking.

{via: another Parisian coffee talk--i love a good cup of coffee and a good friend to discus things such as language with :) and i just think this photograph is beautiful}

cheers,
scribbler

birthdays and clever boasts

today is my birthday.



via {Salisbury cathedral}

and one friend lovingly expressed her birthday sentiments via the phrase, "i'm depressed for you." {this of course being in reference to my age and not the glorious fact that today is my birthday.}

getting older is interesting. and to tell you the truth i am not that old...i just turned 23.

yeah i know right?

all of the 'older' ladies sigh with a "you have no idea; you're so young."

while all of my girls from youth group get big puppy eyes and sigh, "i can't wait to be as old as you; you're so cool." {i guess that last part is an embellishment but whatever; my mom and my roommate both think i'm cool so that's enough evidence for me}

all of this birthday/age talk is to say that i'm really excited to be 23. i'm really excited to be living in England right now. i'm really excited to be experiencing new things and living in the life and season God has placed me in now.

this has taken a while to accept.

and has taken years to actually put into practice. but each year i'm sure i will gain more insight and more wisdom and obviously more candles to my cake.



via {amazing birthday cake thank you lbk}

so happy birthday to me and to all of the other lovelies born on November the 2nd.

and i know you're out there BECAUSE i met one of them today--his name is Vince. and He turned 42 today. He was celebrating at the pub where we ate lunch.


via

He wished me a happy birthday, kissed my hand, offered me a drink {i declined} and then proceed to have me read a text message he had received from his son earlier that morning--it read:

"Happy Birthday Fatboy"


He laughed heartily, patted his stomach, and said something to the effect of "I guess I am a bit of a fat boy round the middle..."

oh how i do love the English. :)


via


cheers,

scribbler